Well “How to talk about Chastity with your kids” advice for parents. Some might find the advice helpful for themselves. Authors on Ignitum Today try to tackle the issue from differing perspectives. One for daughters, and one for sons.
In addition, somewhat related, over at Crisis Magazine, Randall Smith write about Courtship, Etiquette, and the Adolescent Boy. Basically, the apparent disrespect among young guys needs a bit of tempering. Guys need a bit of training, and it rarely happens.
The other day, I walked into a jamba juice. I asked the two young guys if they were in line. One of them was fiddling on his phone. Another answered: “Naw man, jus checkin out da views man, nawwhaddemsayin? Da views man…” At that point I just tuned him out. I knew the pervs were referring to the pack of teenage girls over on the other side of the store.
After they walked out, the gentleman in front of me in line, made eye contact with me, and SHOOK HIS HEAD IN DISAPPROVAL. It’s one thing for girls to get offended. It’s a whole other thing when a guy does. I felt so strengthened and encouraged in my conviction. I was offended too.
Anyways, it occurred to me, how important guys need to build each other up. It’s one thing for a guy to experience the disapproval of a girl for disrespecting her. The disrespectful guy will usually dismiss it as a girl being a nag or a prude. When a guy receives disapproval from a guy, he will be embarrassed.
One of the few times I yelled at a boy in youth ministry, was after one guy was making rude calls to some pretty girl, and I gently scolded them, another guy defended themselves “We’re men we have urges,” to which I exploded “MEEEENNNNN!!!! YOU WANNA KNOW ABOUT MANHOOD!!!!” and I gave them a lecture. They then all proceeded to turn on the first boy making the rude calls, calling him a perv.
I kind of wish I said something to those guys in the jamba juice, perhaps they were bigger then me, perhaps I didn’t expect another guy might get my back. I had wondered if they guy fiddling on his phone was really taking perv pictures on his perv phone for his perv purposes later. I don’t know.